How Do I Escape My Own Prison?

The silence stretched on like smoke, blanketing the walls of her mind in a kind of peace. Or, what would’ve been peace had it been granted in other circumstances.

Instead, the room resembling her mind was more of a prison, the doors all remained open and unlocked, yet, as unspoken as it was, she was never to leave. Never to venture out and find the freedom her soul craved.

No, she would stay here, free to leave her cage, but lacking the strength and willpower to do so.

Another breath full of THC.

She took a step toward the open bars of her cell, as the quiet whisper of her other, darker side, began taunting her with its cruel words.

“Don’t leave, you’ll be all alone out there. In here, you have me.”

Her only friend.

The darkness that lived within her didn’t speak often, but when it did, she knew better than to disobey. She knew better than to go against its wishes, for it was her.

And it had yet to be proven wrong. For every time she’d gone against it in the past, and tried to escape her mental prison, she’d found herself in a world she was not prepared for. She was drowning in a sea of toxicity and self loathing. And the voice had had to step in once more and save her, placing her right back in this cell, where she was guarded, safe, and protected.

So, she stayed in her cell. And she watched through the windows of her own eyes as another lived her life for her. As another made all the difficult decisions she knew she was incapable of making. And it was okay, because she had a friend here. And she wasn’t alone.

She’d never be alone.